"Have you ever seen a white guy blush before?"

I had no idea that the phrase I intended as a joke, would lead to a discussion about racism.

A Few Important Side Notes: I would like to point out that I am the one being quoted in the title, a good number of my students in previous experience had never seen a white person turn red from embarrassment before, and lastly...this does not mean they are strange...it just means they don't see a lot of white people other than me on a given day.

Ok, moving on. During 2nd period on Friday, I had posted a warm-up problem with an unintentional error. Yes, the math teacher made a math mistake...as my students say: "my bad!" Upon that realization, I felt the hue of embarrassment creep up on my cheeks. Looking to make an awkward situation even more awkward (cause that's how I roll), I muttered from the back of the room: "Oh crap...err...well...have you ever seen a white guy blush before?"

What was an intended joke and light-hearted transition to correct my arithmetic mistake, evoked a mixed response of immature giggles (which was my intention) and the unexpected screech of offended horror. Somehow, this offended a room FULL of non-white people.

Another note I forgot to mention before: if you have never met me...I am tall, skinny and white. That's right...now that information is out there for all the information super-highway surfers to find. The secret is unleashed.

So, I came to the front of the room in a flash, claiming that I had made the comment (maybe they thought another student had said it as a cruel joke). Then, from the energetic (at times, spastic) child in the front, Deangelo: "Mr. Milliron, you shouldn't call yourself that."

"I'm sorry, call myself what?" (thinking maybe now it was just a auditory mix-up).

"White."

"So, what am I supposed to call myself?" I said in complete disbelief.

I don't think I was prepared to hear my students be politically correct, being that the concept is lost on them when trying to break up a fight or deter the use of foul langauge. In any event, I found myself in a new world, where children had been raised either fearing the use of the "W" word or at least were unfamiliar with skin color recognition. Alright, that's not entirely fair, but I did pose them a critical question.

"Now, before I offend anyone in this room, how many of you call yourself black?" (several hands raise) "And how many of you call yourself African-American?" (several other hands raise, with a few remaining raised in confusion from the last question. I can only imagine the undecided students were busy pondering the meaning of life).

"Now is it wrong that some of you call yourself black? Is it wrong that some of you call yourself African-American?" Neither response was entirely unanimous, but enough to make my point. So, after assuring them that I was not racist (toward myself or other crackers like me), I made sure that they took "white" off the list of offensive names to call white people list (that we briefly assembled). I also gave them full permission to go home and tell their family: "my math teacher is tall, skinny and white...and he's damn proud of it." (I didn't tell them to swear, but I let one fly...I mean...I had already been racially insensitive, so why not?)

I guess I should probably fear for my job, but for now I'm enjoying a 3-day weekend. Thanks Columbus!

But I'm not saying that because he's white...